Who Wasn't There

🐙Writer, Collector of Antiquities, and Bibliophile.
🐙Co-Creator of FindChaos & ChaosLife comics.

🐙All-Around Weirdo.
❤Posts I Like❤
Posts tagged "writing"
Asker alekpixi Asks:
In regards to your last ask about condoms (which, by the way, is super awesome), I gotta ask for an explanation on the in-mouth technique, because that sounds incredibly crazy but in the super cool way, and I'm slightly scared what will show up if I simply google-search it. Lots of love!
whowasntthere whowasntthere Said:

Well, I’ll try to make this as Not-NSFW as possible. It’s pretty easy!

Take the condom and pop the reservoir end between your lips, with the correct lip of the condom facing away from you (so that it will roll down easily). Like this:

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Make sure your teeth don’t get involved at any point (to avoid ripping the condom), and then simply kiss the top of whatever you’re putting it over — toy, penis, vibrator, etc., — and tilt your head forward to push the condom gently with your lips over the entire object. It’s also okay to use your hands if the object is too long/big.

Hope that helps! <3

Asker Anonymous Asks:
Why are there ONLY butch/femme lesbian couples???
whowasntthere whowasntthere Said:

There aren’t"only" those couples.

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In fact, and this might surprise you, lesbians (and women in general) are individual people with individual preferences in their partner(s). You can find out more about that here, in our comic Lesbians 101. image

Of course, butch/femme couples do indeed exist, but the prevalence of people saying they only see them in-person I chalk up to:

1. Heteronormativity. It’s easy to pick out people who look like “couples” when the default is two cis opposite-sex people. In point of fact, it’s ridiculous how many of my straight, femme women friends are mistaken for lesbians simply because they choose to be around butch or MOC women friends (who sometimes happen to be straight, too!). They aren’t a couple, but people automatically assume it must be so based on outdated and ridiculous couple stereotypes. There must be a polar dynamic in order for a relationship to form, and if two opposites are together, well, golly, they’re certainly fucking!

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And related to that is:

2. Femme Invisibility. That’s a term used mostly in the lesbian community that basically means femme lesbians are overlooked as “real lesbians” or go unnoticed as queer altogether, both by heterosexual people and queer people. I’ve experienced it myself, it’s very real and very silly.

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And on that token, I’ve also experienced what I like to call:

3. Double-Femme-Invisbility. Basically, people don’t fucking notice two femme lesbians. Those two women in skirts and heels sitting at Starbucks? “Friends out for coffee, definitely not a couple!” Those long-haired girls with pink nails browsing the make-up aisle together? “Friends picking out makeup for each other, definitely not lesbians!” Those two older women walking through a wooded ravine with their fashionable scarves? “It’s nice that grandma has a friend! Absolutely never lesbians.” Two ladies sitting in a pediatricians’ office, kids running rampant? “Too bad those women’s husbands couldn’t make it to the doctor visit! Surely they aren’t lesbians!”

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First-hand, when I’ve dated more feminine women: Men still hit on us. If we said “We’re actually a couple. Dating. Lesbians!”? Men would argue with us about the validity of that since we both looked “so girly.” People at stores and restaurants would regularly ask if we were “sisters” and if we said no, they would remark on how nice it was to see such close friends. In a lesser way, this one applies to butch/butch couples as well.  While people might more readily assume they’re queer in some way, they rarely assume two MOC women are a couple. Stereotypes definitely factor in to confirmation bias and it sucks.

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Am I saying there are no butch/femme couples? No, of course not. Just that they’re not the ONLY lesbian couples out there. I know plenty of butch/femme lesbian couples, some people’s entire social circles are made up of such couples. But, then again, some people’s entire social circles are made up of only white, heterosexual cis couples, so don’t always believe that correlation implies causation.

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There are many wonderful ‘samesies’ lesbian couples out there, just as there are unique people with unique preferences.

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So, expand your mind a bit, look beyond your stereotyping and come to accept that there’s more to life than your weird and wacky confirmation bias.

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Asker angelblack3 Asks:
If you and Stiffler are in a monogamous relationship and are [presumably] free of STDs or at least ones that are harmful, how come you both use protection during hanky panky?
whowasntthere whowasntthere Said:

We regularly use condoms during sex, but we don’t use things like dental dams, finger condoms or any other form of protective covering/protection during sex, which would be important if we had any communicable diseases we didn’t want to contract from each other — and are important for anyone participating in sex to be aware of and use diligently if they aren’t “fluid bonded” like we are.

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To the crux of the issue, we personally use condoms for several reasons:

  • It’s easier to switch up orifices. We might like getting our cock (strap-on) sucked, but we don’t like ass-to-mouth. It’s also healthier for vaginal penetration if we’re using the same toy for anal to simply take off the (used) condom and apply a clean one. They work for fingers in much the same way, too and you don’t have to worry about bacteria trapped under nails after a round.

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  • Toys can’t be implicitly trusted! You can read about fake toys in this lovely article here, which is sadly a very pervasive problem in the sex-toy industry and there’s no way to tell with 100% certainty (other than buying directly from smaller companies) that the toy you’re buying isn’t a knock off. And some toys are made with porous materials that can lock in bacteria. And some toys are made of materials that could be hazardous to delicate skin or cause allergic reactions. It’s simply safer and more practical to use a condom with every toy we have, whether or not it’s penetrative.*

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  • Added lubrication or sensations. Most condoms come with added lube on the inside and outside, making any sex (penetrative or not) more enjoyable. You can also buy ones with fun things like cooling mint, ribs and dots, flavors, warming sensations, etc., etc., that vary up sex.

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  • Condoms are sexy. A lot of people don’t think so, because in most of media condoms are never shown and if they are, it’s usually a joke or to be absolutely eye-rolled at. In our bedroom, we have a pretty box dedicated to condoms with a little faux-gem handle on top. When we see that glamorous box sitting on the bedside table, we know that not just 69ing is about to happen, but the Full Monty of some kind will be going down. Putting the condom on is amazingly sexy, from the in-mouth technique to simply sliding it on a toy slowly or quickly before the toy is used. It’s a sexy way to not only initiate sex, but also to communicate in our relationship what type of sex we’re going to have and a type of mental foreplay that’s very satisfying. And it’s always sexy when you care about your partner’s health and well-being.

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  • Communication is sexy. Speaking of communication, simply buying condoms (whether interesting flavors/shapes/etc. or not) helps us initiate a conversation about our sexual preferences and desires. Why those particular condoms, what we’d like to do with them, things we haven’t enjoyed about previous types, things we highly enjoy about past sex acts, etc. It helps us stay abreast (ha) of our current sexual preferences and desires in an easy, fun way that can also spark new ideas to experiment with.

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  • Roleplay is sexy. I’ve mentioned it before, but my spouse and I like to roleplay and sometimes that means roleplaying during sex. Having condoms handy means that some of the roleplaying is even more realistic and by that benefit, even naughtier than imagined.

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  • It helps with BDSM. We also practice a lot of (safe, consensual) BDSM — condoms are yet another way for us to be either assertive or passive in sex. By having the other person put on the condom, especially while they’re restrained in some way, it’s a form of the dom/sub/switch relationship we’ve built with each other to be exercised in a very sexual manner.

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These are, at least, the main reason we use condoms. We love them, they’re safer and sexier than going without and we know our sex life is happy and full of randy times because we buy them frequently. Condoms are just another way for us to stay connected to each other in all aspects of our sex-life. <3

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*Of course, we always clean our toys/restraints/sheets/hands/bodies thoroughly after sex and boil the toys we can every week, but it doesn’t hurt to take extra precautions when it comes to your sexual health and well-being.

Hi! have you ever thought of writing a smut book… like a collection of stories or something like that? I’m curious because I’ve read some of your sexy stuff and really love them. I would totally buy it, just imagine: “fifty shades of K”
Thank you! And…
I like this idea. <3 I could even have my spouse do little dirty illustrations.
Our Shower: A short auto-bio erotica writing warm-up that I left ungendered and without specific genitalia, most purposely. I would do a “Read More” but those tend to get their links mixed up on Tumblr. Please forgive my long-ish text post. 
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Our Shower
I know you’ve been stressed lately. You don’t say it, and you don’t need to. I’m married to you — I know when you feel the weight of the world. I also know we just lost a giant chunk of your recent art in moving computers. But we both know: it will be okay, no matter what. Still, I want to do something for you…
It’s been a sweltering week. We’ve been working non-stop. The sweat and the stress has accumulated. I took a shower this morning, but you put yours off so that you could get more work done. I know you hate showers anyway.
When you finally have your e-mails sent off, the comics you need to draw sent off and it’s time to give your drawing hand a rest, I offer a suggestion. You accept.
I start the shower and get undressed. I help you get undressed, too. I tell you to wrap the silk blindfold around your eyes after you’ve entered the shower. I wait.
I pause just long enough to make sure you don’t notice when I’m right in front of you. I want to make sure you’re completely lacking sight. You are.
I let myself take in your nude form, watching the water gently cascade over your body as you stand there, looking a little uncertain. 
I lean in slowly and kiss your neck, then down your collar bone. You’re surprised, but you smile.
I can taste salty sweat on your skin, feel your heart beating. I bring my left hand up to your shoulder and slowly run it down the length of your arm, all the way to your hand, where I slip my fingers past your palm and lock them into yours. You bite your lip. You’re temporarily blind, but you smile as if you know what’s coming. 
I wash your hair first — the mundane out of the way. I use the shampoo I know you like and give you a head massage, making sure to keep the soap away from your blindfold as I rinse your blonde curls. I let my hands glide down the side of your face, tracing your features lovingly.
I pick up the bar of soap — the one that’s scented like hazelnut coffee — and begin lathering your upper chest. You sigh and remark how lavish it is. I’m only just getting started.
I run the soap down your collarbones and around your nipples carefully. I kiss your cheek and nibble on your ear as I let the soap run down your boney ribs, past your stomach and to your hip. Your torso is covered in suds now, so I focus on your arms. I have to be delicate with your underarms — you’re ticklish while I’m not — so I rub the hollows with care, going down and around your back. 
I reach behind you, pressing my chest to yours, making you breath in with surprise. I lather up your spine, rubbing my thumb between your shoulder blades in a slow massage. I work my way to the small of your back. I lower myself down.
I kiss your belly as I press the bar of soap to your firm ass, working in circles on both sides, then letting my hand glide into the middle. I cup my hand around and under, reaching all the way to your heat, letting my fingers slip around your most delicate skin, savoring every inch of your sex. 
I kiss past your thigh, gently pulling your leg forward and kissing down to your knee as I soap up your legs. You’re relaxed, you bend your legs easily to me, letting me slide the soap up and down your inner thigh as many times as I want. 
I finally stand again and you’re surprised when I kiss you on the mouth. I put the soap away behind you, onto the shower caddy, and start rinsing you off — I do it all by hand. I trace the exact route I took with the soap, but this time I let my fingers dance over you in sweeping motions, brushing the soft soap suds and water off of your hard body with my palms. 
I suddenly turn you around, touching my nipples to your back as I hold you to the rushing water. You reach your hands back to grab my hips, but I catch your wrists and push your hands against the wall, bending you at the waist. Tracing the curve of your back and hips with my fingertips, I kneel again. Spreading your small ass cheeks with my hands, this time, I kiss a more intimate place. 
I let my tongue explore your soft skin, I let it dive into you. I lick up and down, savoring every inch of your flesh as if it were a ripe fruit. I keep my hands busy, up and down your slim, gazelle-like legs and even reaching up to your chest to pull at your nipples while I nuzzle into you.
I can tell you’re aroused fully now. I stand again, spinning you around, pressing you to the other wall, and kissing you hard on the lips. I force my tongue inside your hot mouth. You reciprocate, sucking at my tongue and relaxing enough to let my fingers work their way into your tight hole.
I reach to the side quietly, taking the shower head out of its holster. I deftly switch it to the Pulse function and lower it, letting it pound against your hot sex as I slip my fingers in and out of you. You grab my shoulders, standing up on your toes as the surprising pleasure escalates.
I watch as your lips part, mouth flushed. I watch as your chest turns a bright red. I watch as your thigh muscles tense and release over and over again. I watch and I fuck you, paying attention to every nuance of your physical changes, making sure that when you moan, I repeat my actions to make you moan even more, to make your thighs and ass tense.
You cum. 
I grin.
You shudder.
I can feel you tighten even more around my fingers. I slip them out of you as you come down from your orgasm. I kiss your neck and the side of your face, rubbing my nose into your cheek affectionately. To my surprise, you turn the shower nozzle to my groin. 
I let it wash over me, then I take it in hand, pressing you back against the wall even harder and kissing you deeply. I try to shove my tongue down your throat as I picture fucking you, letting my fantasy of you later run away with me, even as I fuck you now. 
I cum hard, moaning into your mouth, my thighs shaking, my chest heaving against yours. I throw my head back and give it my all, knowing this fuck is just the first of many. I let my lungs relax again as I collapse against you. You pet my hair lovingly.
But you’re still blindfolded. You don’t notice when I turn the shower nozzle back towards your red-hot sex. 
You let out a surprised sound, saying something about not being able to get off again. I stay silent. I reach behind you, grabbing your ass hard. I let the water pound against you as I pick you up by your hips. You gasp. Your legs quiver. Your chest turns an even brighter shade of crimson. You grab me, clenching, fingernails digging into my shoulders. I press against you, biting the side of your neck hard. Your legs are shaking at an alarming rate now, your ass clenching and unclenching. You gasp again, but it turns into a moan. The moan turns into a scream. I’m so incredibly turned on that I start cumming again, my muscles spasming in ecstasy. 
You scream so loudly that I shove my tongue into your mouth, letting you scream into me, rocking my hips rhythmically against yours. You cum into me. I cum into you. We cum again. You’re still blind and I’m still cumming as I watch you…  
I know you’re stressed. I want to do something for you… But I’ve gotten a treat out of it myself. 
When we go to bed afterwards, I hold you so closely. I love your body against my body. 
I hope I managed to relieve your stress. I hope I managed to let you know how much I love you. I hope I managed to convince you to take more blind showers with me. I love how you quiver when you’re not watching. I love watching when you do quiver… 
I hope to make you quiver again soon… 

aburningrose:

Auburn leaves in Autumn seas ask arrantly of all of thee as Autumn’s seen attendently of apple trees with spice on breeze so ascendantly to aid of bees to fly with ease and care of these who carry seeds of unborn needs so each of thee may sleep with dreams made of gentle seams and see away all each of these who speak in ways that leave us all so breathlessly.

Meal While Working: The Usual Suspects.

Animating a very teeny-tiny bit of ChaosLife tonight for the new strip tomorrow, then throwing myself into writing. Productivity muses be with me.

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That moment when the idea in your head, your research and your actual writing material all click together in such a cohesive way you have to imagine it’s serendipity.

Can I write more than 400 words tonight? Let’s find out!